Monday, February 15, 2010

The "I'm Gonna" Disease

Of late, people suffering from the legendary "I'm Gonna" disease have been running rampant in my life. I hate this disease. I've had it many times before but I'm trying to build up my immune system against it. I don't really enjoy associating with individuals while they suffer from this affliction.

What is the "I'm Gonna" disease?
It's that thing that makes you talk about your plans, but never follow through with them. While this is permissible as an "every once in a while" kind of thing, repeat offenders are classified as having the "I'm gonna" disease.

You drop and break my television. I don't ask you for a new one or anything but you say "I'm gonna get you another one." Two years later, you're still saying the same thing.

You have BIG dreams for your career. Every time you talk to your friends you tell them about how much writing you are gonna get done, how many new songs you're gonna record, the people you're gonna meet, and the seven places you're gonna go this year. It begins to get a bit old when you don't do any of it.

You're talking on the phone with someone. Something comes up. Instead of just excusing yourself normally, you tell the person you are gonna call them back in two minutes. They never hear from you, or you call them back the next day. You do this multiple times per week. Guess what? That person will probably be okay if you just say, "I've gotta go." There life will still go on. However, when you start to talk about what you're gonna do, it can get confusing...

You are the roommate/spouse/guest/child who says, "No, don't worry about the trash, I'm gonna take it out," or "I'm gonna wash all my dishes today," or "I'm gonna clean up that mess I made in the bathroom in a few minutes." We begin to wonder what you mean three days later when we are the ones cleaning up after you. This is especially confusing when the person in question is a grown up.

And finally, you are the business associate (co-worker, client, boss, whoever) that is always saying they're gonna e-mail a certain document, they're gonna update you when such and such happens, they're gonna pay you for the job you did last week. Okay we get it! By "I'm gonna" you mean you have absolutely no intention of doing it and you are just saying it because you know we want to hear it.

Good intentions or not, sometimes the "I'm gonna" disease translates to empty words and broken promises. If you are a habitual "I'm gonna"-er then please, seek help today. Do it for your loved ones; do it for yourself. Start to use words like "I'm not sure if I'll be able to...", or "I'd like to...but I may not have the time", or even, "I can't do such and such. I'm sorry." Don't be like me. I used to try to do everything for everyone and promise the world to those around me. I'd like to apologize to all those who have been the victim of me and this disease!

Part of being a successful artist or business person is knowing your boundaries and being honest about your limits or capabilities. Have you suffered from this disease? Do you know people like this?